Miles and miles of strip malls with divorce lawyers, cheap tattoo parlors, pawn shops,etc.,
Wal-Marts every mile, trailer courts, trailer parks, trailer trash, malls, strip malls, mini-malls, cops, cops, cops,
artery-clogging steak houses, McDonald's/Wendy's/Taco Bells every quarter mile, constant hot/humid weather, dixie this, dixie that,
little lizards climbing the trees, "neighbors" who will call the cops on you at the slightest provocation,
Banks every 500yds when you don't have any money, useless spanish moss,
people from other countries working public service jobs who speak a different language than you,
more cops,
highway billboards (for readers) too numerous to describe obscuring highway signs,
most of them offering funeral / cremation deals
or promoting another "lemming trap"
alcohol-related trend, seniors driving 30m.p.h. on the highway ,
uneducated/scary-looking people with cheap tattoos, sinkholes,
sleazy strip-joints, guaranteed minimum wage jobs, liquor stores every 2 blocks,
"Jerry Springer" people everywhere, even more cops,
official state "zero tolerance" signs
with a little illustration of handcuffs to rub-the-point-in (bastards),
traffic lights synchronized so cops can ticket you easier,
speed bumps designed to damage car suspension systems,
gated communities loaded with better-than-thou people,
FAT cops with mean grins,
white trash from god-knows-where that just got out of prison last month usually playing their stereo loud at night so you can't sleep,
neighbors sitting on cheap lawn furniture on front lawn drinking cheap beer (watching you),
mosquitoes that fly SO fast you actually can't swat them,
snakes/alligators/fire ants/scorpions, alcohol/drug-addicted welfare people driving, running, walking & crawling everywhere if they're not standing in line waiting to cash in empty beer cans.
An entire state without a museum or cultural institution in sight for 100's of miles but there's always a Wal-Mart 300 yards away from you.
Goodbye Florida, I won't be back.
Wal-Marts every mile, trailer courts, trailer parks, trailer trash, malls, strip malls, mini-malls, cops, cops, cops,
artery-clogging steak houses, McDonald's/Wendy's/Taco Bells every quarter mile, constant hot/humid weather, dixie this, dixie that,
little lizards climbing the trees, "neighbors" who will call the cops on you at the slightest provocation,
Banks every 500yds when you don't have any money, useless spanish moss,
people from other countries working public service jobs who speak a different language than you,
more cops,
highway billboards (for readers) too numerous to describe obscuring highway signs,
most of them offering funeral / cremation deals
or promoting another "lemming trap"
alcohol-related trend, seniors driving 30m.p.h. on the highway ,
uneducated/scary-looking people with cheap tattoos, sinkholes,
sleazy strip-joints, guaranteed minimum wage jobs, liquor stores every 2 blocks,
"Jerry Springer" people everywhere, even more cops,
official state "zero tolerance" signs
with a little illustration of handcuffs to rub-the-point-in (bastards),
traffic lights synchronized so cops can ticket you easier,
speed bumps designed to damage car suspension systems,
gated communities loaded with better-than-thou people,
FAT cops with mean grins,
white trash from god-knows-where that just got out of prison last month usually playing their stereo loud at night so you can't sleep,
neighbors sitting on cheap lawn furniture on front lawn drinking cheap beer (watching you),
mosquitoes that fly SO fast you actually can't swat them,
snakes/alligators/fire ants/scorpions, alcohol/drug-addicted welfare people driving, running, walking & crawling everywhere if they're not standing in line waiting to cash in empty beer cans.
An entire state without a museum or cultural institution in sight for 100's of miles but there's always a Wal-Mart 300 yards away from you.
Goodbye Florida, I won't be back.
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